My Dear Seniors (And Anyone Else that Feels Like Reading)...

My Dear Seniors (and anyone else who feels like reading),

Oh, May, the season of graduation. The stack of graduation invitations I have currently residing on my bookshelf is enormous. The weekends of this month are consumed with graduations, the parties celebrating said graduations, and emotional social media posts by grads and people who care about them sighing over the fact that they’re growing up. Such fun.

One of my closest friends graduated the year before me, and two of them graduated with me last year, but the majority graduate this year so I also will most likely be one of those people with the over emotional social media posts. As I got to thinking about this time last year when I walked the stage, I realized that I have grown (well, at least from my perspective!) in many areas and gained wisdom that would have been useful to me a year ago. So, as a pretty recent graduate myself, these are some things that I think you, as a Senior (or simply you as a person) should hear.

1. You’re the bottom of the food chain.

That sounds pretty demeaning, so I should probably explain before the rotten fruit starts flying. Most people would read that and either be offended or assume that I am talking about the adjustment from Kings and Queens of High School to struggling through the freshman year of college. Nope.

I was an arrogant Senior. I thought I was super mature, super grown up, had my life together and knew what was what. I know that as Seniors, we can all get super giant egos and heads from being able to “rule” over underclassmen, be in charge of things, or simply all the honoring and crap that comes at the end of your high school career. It is extremely freeing to realize how truly young you are, and how far you need to grow and mature to become wise. Hey, and if anyone in society is top of the food chain, it’s probably the grandparents out there: they’ve had plenty of time to work on this. You rock grandparents!

2. It is okay to admit that you don’t know what you’re doing with your life.

Not everyone has a twelve step plan for their life right when they’re graduating, and you know what, that’s perfectly fine. Gives the Holy Spirit more room to work anyway! Don’t feel like you have to fake some plan for when the relatives start asking, or go spend a ton of money on a school you don’t really like doing a major you hate just to make more money in the future. Have a direction (meaning don’t just sit there and do nothing), but make sure you come to terms with the fact that it is perfectly fine to not have everything in place right now. As long as you keep moving forward, you’ll learn what your strengths, talents and gifts are, and learn how to use them.

3. There’s nothing wrong with community college.

I’m probably a little too biased to make this point since I’ll be obtaining an associate’s degree from a local community college this fall, but I’m going to make it anyway. Do NOT feel pressured to go to a super expensive four year school if you don’t know exactly what you want to do, can’t afford it or are just going because “it’s what everybody else does”. Community colleges have made leaps and bounds in the past few years, especially in the realm of technical training, and are places where you can still obtain a quality education, but you can do it at a fraction of the price. It’s worth not having the glamour of “going off to school” or having every single perk of a four year school to walk into the adult world with so much less debt. That and another benefit to community college is that your life is not linked to your school; you go to class and do your homework, but your life pretty much happens completely outside of school.

I could delve into the spiritual realm of graduating and give a detailed summary of how to hold to your own faith when your parents aren’t the ones pushing it anymore, or go into so many other areas and tips and tricks, but I think I will leave this concise and practical. Congratulations Seniors! Just remember that when you get out into “adulthood” and it’s terrifying…no one else really knows what they’re doing either, so you’re in good company. J

be still.

It’s hard to be quiet, still, silent

Because in that silence there’s still whispering

That makes you come face-to-face with

Who you are, where you’re wrong, what you’ve done

You relive nightmares and plans gone wrong

Forced to deal with the bitterness and anger in your own soul

You learn things about yourself you wish to forget

But although the silence reminds us of our worst

Silence is also where Hope breathes and Spirit covers

And as you come face-to-face with your

Ugliness, filth, battle scars

Transformation takes place

Suddenly your own insignificance seems perfectly adequate

Because you’re not living through your own adequacy

But His

Your dim past is the perfect set up for a brilliant future

Because if Jesus is the King of Comebacks

What makes you think He doesn’t have a handle on

Your story, your future, His glory?

But your purpose doesn’t reveal itself through striving

No, it comes in quiet

Moments where we learn to listen

Condition us to actually walk with Him

So if you want to be transformed

Come alive, know his will

He simply asks you to come to Him

And be still. 

Isn't this MY technology?

Why do people ask the question, “Why didn’t you favorite my tweet?”? Think about it, just actually think about it for a second. It may not necessarily be that question, but we have all heard variations of that question (for example, “Why didn’t you answer my call sooner?”). There is this form of social obligation when it comes to technology.

 I can see this pop up in my life constantly. No, I’m not someone who will call you out for not liking my Instagram selfie or becoming one of my Twitter followers (because, lets face it...that’s stupid), but apologizing if it takes me more than 15 minutes to reply to a text or call someone back? *Raises hand* Guilty, so very guilty.

I just recently upgraded my phone to an iPhone 6, and while most college students would love the change, it has been very bittersweet for me. Is it nice to have a GPS, email, bank account and other things accessible on the go? Yes. Is it enjoyable to have something that beeps or buzzes at me all day long to talk to someone or like something to fulfill my “social media obligation”? Not one bit.

 

I have come back to a single question over and over: why do we cave into technological obligation? Seriously, why are we so pressured into social media and techy stuff that we feel we are obligated to like something, must return a text within 2 minutes (or even 15 minutes, an hour, or whatever span of time), and that we can’t possibly put our phones down?  I’ve thought about this to the point where I have actually become quite ticked off with this culture of technology obligation that has been created.

So here is my schpiel to you. Your technology is your own, YOURS. It is a tool for you to use (or abuse) as you like (please use it not abuse it though, because that’s obviously not good). That phone of yours? It is in YOUR pocket.

That being said, quit being a slave to your friends via your technology, and quit bowing down to the idol of Apple. Like what you will like, follow who you will follow, comment on what you will comment on. Take whatever time you want to return to a phone call or a text, it is up to YOU when you choose to contact people (as a quick sidenote, I am currently talking about social media use...please return your phone calls for work and things you’re responsible for...but still don’t be a slave to that! Boundaries are fantastic!).

It is perfectly okay to not follow your best friend on social media if you love her in person but want to beat your head against your desk when you scroll through their Facebook page. If someone texts you “Hey”, take your own darn time in responding, after all, it is a conversation which you choose to be in. Just because someone comments something really sweet on your Instagram selfie does NOT mean you have to do likewise.

 
Use your technology in a way that suits you, that makes the best of your tool, and in a way you actually WANT to. I don’t believe that simply having your iPhone in your pocket places a ball and chain around your ankle, I believe that it is the people that attempt to get you to use it constantly that do that. Please, for your own sake, get your nose out of your phone and into some real conversation, and realize that you are not obligated to use social media and social technology for anyone beside you. Don’t let it rule you, because that’s Jesus’ job.

Quit Pointing

In the book, Life Together by Dietrich Bonhoeffer, an amazing theologian who was imprisoned and executed by the Nazis for his active work against Hitler, an extremely solid point is made that I feel deserves some recognition.

“But if not, let him nevertheless guard against ever becoming an accuser of the congregation before God. Let him rather accuse himself for his unbelief. Let him pray God for an understanding of his own failure and his particular sin, and pray that he may not wrong his brethren. Let him, in the consciousness of his own guilt make intercession for his brethren. Let him do what he is committed to do, and thank God.”

            

You see, Life Together is about living as a community through Christ, and the section that I just quoted warned against the believer criticizing the body of Christ. This is something that stood out to me as something I have often struggled with. As Christians, we tend to get this vision, a dream of sorts in our brains of what the “perfect” Church and Christian community should look like, not realizing that we are all innately flawed and God has a plan for His body of believers that is often much different than ours. When His plan differs from ours, or there is an error or sin committed in the body (which will happen, because, you know…even while saved we’re still sinners), we like to brutalize the body, becoming critics of it.

           

This was something that I had to force myself to stop doing, and I’m still guilty of it from time to time. Let me put it simply: the Church is not going to look how you want it to. God’s plans outrank ours on every level, and His ways are mysterious, so of course the community He has designed it going to look differently than what the human capacity of our brains comes up with. We like to forget that the body is still made up of sinners; He knows this on an intimate level and has designed community in light of our flaws.

            

Instead of pointing fingers at the Church when things don’t go according to our plan or the community is different than we’d like it to be, let us take the words of Bonhoeffer to heart. We need to look inward to find out what is going on in our own hearts and souls to set us at odds with our brothers and sisters, and intercede with the Father on behalf of our Church and community. I know that at times there are problems within the Church that most definitely need to be addressed and taken care of before they become toxic to the body, but let us stop this habit of pointing fingers at the Church. Let us hold our brothers and sisters in the light of Christ, and love the Church the way Christ loves it.

            

How to Get Your Legislator to Listen (To Your Online Voice)

       As many of you know, I work in the Iowa State House on the floor for one of the Representatives. Part of my job is to read emails from constituents, and often times to help answer them. In doing this, I have observed many things that people who want to get through to their legislator should be doing, and many things they need to fix for their legislator to take them seriously. If you enjoy being politically active and want to be taken seriously by your local representation (even if they don’t necessarily agree with you), here’s a short list to help you communicate effectively online.*

#1. Spell check is your new best friend.

   

It seems like something so stupidly simple that you would think most people should know this, but you would be amazed by the amount of emails and messages that we receive that are full of grammatical and spelling errors, or are simply rambling and incoherent. Write out what you mean to say...and then read through it about five times to fix things. Take that extra little bit of time to make your message look and sound professional, you would be amazed at how much it makes you stand out.

#2. What email are you sending this from?

    Sorry folks, but the second I read “katieluvspuppies4ever@gmail.com” in the “from” line, I am already extremely doubtful of the content of your email, and if I’m having that reaction, your legislator is definitely having that reaction. You don’t necessarily have to create a whole new account just to send one email, but if you want stand out as someone who sounds professional and should be taken seriously, email addresses that are nonsensical, created when you were twelve or containing profanity are just not going to cut it.

#3. Check your length.

    If you send an email that is about a sentence long or simply says, “Vote for/don’t vote for (insert bill here),” your email does not stand out. Is it easy to reply to? Yes, but it does not truly make your point stand out in the legislator’s mind. Even adding a tiny bit of content can help you stand out.

    On the flip side, if you write an email that is pages (or really even more than fiveish paragraphs long), it is usually hard to find your point, write a reply back, and also doesn’t stick with your legislator. The key here is balance; work on finding that optimum length that will make your email stand out but not take forever to read.

#4. Ask questions.

   

      I am going to be completely blunt here. When there are mass amounts of email coming in about the same subject, I generally send a form letter containing information about that subject that can be sent in reply to the emails that are simply someone supporting/opposing that issue and just speaking their mind. Legislators are busy, mine sometimes barely has time to eat, but we still want you to know we hear you so we try to reply to every constituent email, if even with a form letter. However, if someone replies with interactive material (for example, questions and suggestions), my legislator generally sits down, processes, and tries to write a very specific response. Want a detailed reply? Send an email that calls for it.

#5. Avoid rudeness completely.

    One of the things that bothers me most is when people send rude, arrogant, or obnoxious emails voicing their opinion. That is easily the fastest way to keep your legislator from supporting your cause. They’ll most likely send you a polite response...while rolling their eyes and muttering under their breath about it. If you disagree with something they have done/are doing, feel free to let them know, but do it in a kind and professional manner (and definitely do not add expletives!). Being polite even when you disagree with them gets you SO much farther than rudeness, trust me.

    Well, there you have it. Just know that these rules don’t just apply to emailing your legislators, they apply to any professional email you will send. When being politically active, think about these to make sure your online voice is actually listened to, not just merely heard. **

*Know that even as I write these, every legislator is different and handles email differently. However, these are a pretty good blanket that apply to most everyone you would email.

**Your legislator still might disagree with you, but at least you know that you were doing your best to get them to see your opinion.

Young Example

    “Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity.” (1 Timothy 4:12)

    Go back and reread that verse. Now do it again...and again. Even though I was not a Christian for a large chunk of my life, growing up in the Church meant I heard that verse over...and over...and...you get my point. It was everywhere from Sunday school to youth group to retreats. People pounding what example the young generation is supposed to provide within the Church. The verse was read to me and used in lessons I heard so frequently that I became very desensitized to the true mean it holds.

    I just finished reading through 1 Timothy in my Bible study plan. When I hit that verse, I started to just skim through, and then I made myself stop and actually read it, and read it deeply. It hit me like a train. There is a vast amount of wisdom that verse, and I had totally been missing it. So now, allow me to share with you my notes that I scrawled out in my devotional notebook on how that verse applies to the young Christian (please note, when I say scrawled...I mean it.).

#1. Speech

    We are to set an example by watching our mouths. If we have slanderous, malicious, gossiping talk rolling off of our tongues, what kind of role model are we? God is calling us to be leaders in setting this example for those even younger than us (and some that are older!) in watching our mouths. The tongue is a world of evil, and we (VERY much including myself) need to learn to control it.

#2. Conduct

    Do you act like an immature idiot? Are you sexually suggestive? How you carry yourself and your conduct scream so many things about the type of person you are. If you truly want to be a good example to the rest of the body of believers, watch the way you walk. Actions speak louder than words.

#3. Love

    Are you catty and malicious, or do you love others with the selfless love God has shown you? Love isn’t becoming a total pushover with a lack of personality as many come to believe. Love is putting another person before yourself, protecting that person, caring for the person and keeping the same mentality that Jesus has about you toward them. Whether it is standing up for someone when they are being treated like they have absolutely no value, biting back that sarcastic comment because you know it will hurt the other person, or even simply sharing the Gospel with them, there are so many various ways we can show love to other people. Let us set an example of love for the rest of the body of believers.

#4. Faith

    If you haven’t figured out by now, this rambling of a post is directed toward young adults (High Schoolers, college students, people in their twenties, etc.). We are a generation that has a reputation for not being able to commit to something and put their faith in it. We hop from church to church, faith to faith as if there is absolutely no personal consequence that comes from it. Let us lead an example by placing our faith in Christ and letting Him be our Rock; having faith that doesn’t waver even through the darkness of life.

#5. Purity

    Another thing our generation is known for is being immoral when it comes to our sexuality. The best way you can set an example in this realm is to hold yourself to a higher standard-God’s standard. Set the boundaries needed in your life to pursue holiness in purity and be that Christ-like example on the issue.

The Problem with Christian Feminism

The feminist movement has spread like wildfire in the United States. You see women rising up to push for different things everywhere, such as the end of sexual abuse and trafficking or a “woman’s right to choose”. In a country where feminism used to be the exception, it has now become the rule.
As a Christian woman, I am worried, but I’m not worried about the movement itself. There are things in the movement that I completely agree with (such as the previously mentioned push to end sexual abuse and trafficking), and there are also many facets of the movement that I completely disagree with (such as pushing for a “woman’s right to choose” when it puts her innocent baby’s life on the line or the deep bitterness toward men I see consistently within many feminists I know). Even with the things that I disagree with, I have had to come to terms with the fact that the movement was started by and is still led by women (and sometimes men) that are not followers of Jesus. Therefore, why should I be surprised when they don’t act like Christ and push for the things that break His heart?

No, the reason why I am worried is because of the mass amount of Christian women that have jumped on board. Although this is worrying when we discuss different things (such as abortion) that many Christian women are quickly becoming okay with, I am most worried when we realize how many women are rejecting scripture dealing with Biblical womanhood because of feminism. Quite simply, feminism and the Bible are at odds with one another. You can either be a fully fledged follower of the feminist movement, or you can be a fully fledged liver of the Word of God. To see the contrast is as simple as looking at some scripture...

                   

Ephesians 5:23: “For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior.”

Colossians 3:18: “Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.”

I could have listed many more verses that deal with how women should relate to men (and vice versa!)-the Bible is extraordinarily clear on the subject.  Women are rejecting these key verses, not realizing that you either have to take or leave the Bible as a whole; either it’s all true and to be followed or none of it is. A strong characteristic of the feminist movement is the rejection of a man’s authority and a claim of absolute independence and control, and to see this trend in the Church is disturbing.

Ultimately, when women reject what the Bible says on this subject, they’re not rebelling against their husbands (or future husbands) or the “old-fashioned” way the Church works; they’re rebelling against God himself. This is not a problem with the men in the Church, although I could write many long and rambling posts on how Christian men need to shape up and stand up; this is a problem of the heart. This is yet another example of how Satan works through making pride, selfishness and rebellion in our hearts attractive and popular. When a woman’s heart is full of those things, the next logical step is to fight to be completely free from controlling and guiding influences, therefore, you get the “fight for independence” that so many women in the Church are joining today.

Sisters in Christ, can I just plead with you for a second? When we act like this toward the men in the Church, it weakens everything: our relationship with God, the body of Christ and it even can help take a strong man and make him weak. I know how attractive the world seems, and how they glorify and worship a “strong and independent woman”, trust me honey, I know how hard it is to get away from that- it’s something I struggle through daily.

I also know that none of us are perfect, and therefore our relationships with men (or anyone for that matter) will never be perfect. But that also isn’t a reason to just act however you want and ignore Biblical teaching on the subject. By the grace of God, fallen hearts have been redeemed, and that also means fallen and broken relational skills.
So my challenge for you is to just fight to be a godly, Bible obeying and Christ following woman in this culture where womanhood is being so blatantly twisted. Darlin, it will be hard, and there are times when culture is going to be screaming at you so loudly to act one way when you know God has called you to act like Him, but it is beyond worth it. Let us be the women that stand up for our men, our Churches and our relationships with Christ and fight back against this culture.